Time for a clear out ? Eat your heart out e-bay. You've competition!
Hmmm, some of my readers have a warped sense of humour. Bring it on I say :)
Yesterday's semi serious post about the subject of depression/boxing gloves has landed me a comment from a the "Boxing Promoter "Mr Millsy". Salesman extraordinaire - methinks he wants me to try out his equipment!
And I quote
"Boxing is a sport where there is an immense requirement of heavy training in order to perform effectively. In a profession like boxing there is immense requirement that the boxers take extra care while they are in the ring. You can get more information about Boxing Equipment.
Mr Chopper ( a very funny chappie) is also using my comments box for a delightful once in a life time offer. One careful owner. He has a half tube of Haemorrhoid Cream up for grabs. I'm informed it comes with a fairly clean applicator. Any takers?
And now Ms Leigh ( a very witty lady) has got into the act. She has a delightful item for sale. This is not your bog standard item. No indeed not. Every home should have one!
FOR SALE
Loo cistern in two parts, 1981 model, diarrhoea coloured (note: this is the original colour). Large fracture down left-hand side, but clean break, so should glue okay with Araldite. Contains only slightly scaled-up ball valve. Working order (except for the broken bit). Please email for photos. Free to collector (£10 to dealers).
I'm sure if pressed she will post a piccy up on her blog for you to have a look at the merchandise. (Go on Ms Leigh, I dare you!)
RED ALERT/ UPDATE 21.56 hours or thereabouts. I've pulled her chain and Ms Leigh has risen to the challenge. Check out the piccy here :
This is my item:-
"One over used and under developed brain. Liable to breakdown from time to time. But given love, peace, hope and plenty of substance like chocolate or home cooking (not drugs, don't do them) will continue to motor along nicely. Free to good home."
So what bit of tat do you want to get rid of ?
Free Ad. No Fees. Items will be posted on this blog. Go on use your imagination, make us smile :)
5 hours ago
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20 COMMENTS:
Well there's a thing. This house if full of old tat. Wouldn't know where to start to be honest.
CJ xx
Up for Grabs
1 complete set of year 12's, typical of the genre, big hoop earrings, omnipresent gum, ipod headphones permanently dangling, skin tight jeans with de riguer thong motif, loud annoying ringtone on phone, more make up than Coco, knock off miu miu bag and finished off with ugg boots.
Any takers ? No ? can't think why...
Ah-ha [tosses cape over shoulder]
I have met your challenge, Mistress Foolery: go see.
In the meantime, I would happily offer a home to your poor tired brain, but I fear my cooking causes delirium similar to that experienced by drug users. But if you don't mind living on takeaways...
Hang on, let me have a rummage in the drawer - got it!
For sale: One chopstick, as new. Unwanted present, would suit learner.
CJ, grab pen and paper and start compiling your list woman.
Autiegwen, LOL! Oh, how I can relate to that one. Don't forget their unique selling point "We come with attitude with a capital "A" :)
Leigh, I laugh sooo much I've wet my knickers :) I'm very partial to a "Vin da Loo" I'll bring my own bog roll.
Tam, LOL :) "would suit a learner or a one-armed bandit". BTW is it right or a left handed chopstick?
One sparingly used (we're married) condom. It was only last night when making love whilst listening to an old punk record that I considered the need to replace it with a new one. My wife asked me "Is that Johnny Rotten?"
Oh TF...you make a me laugh!..
Bit of old tat has to be my body, it has been falling apart from an early age..trouble is I need it.
I can think of a few bits of old tat I could get rid of!
Ha Ha!
Complete set of knee scabs. Will post worldwide.
I have a collection of toe-nail clippings from 1974. The Quality Street tin is nearly full now and so I feel, with a heavy heart, that it is time to pass them on to a new home. I will reluctantly let them go free of charge to a good home. NB; Police checks may be carried out.
Ha, ha, ha. Me thinks Troy and Chopper need medication. Now.
I am desperately trying to shift about 14lbs of unwanted fat. Sits nicely on the hips ... can be poured (with some considerable effort) into jeans. Will swap for complete set of knee scabs.
Troy, you're one naughty boy!
"Oh, Johnny, be good to me.." :)
Blu, My mission is to make you laugh. Let's just see if we get anyone selling a liposuction machine ;-) Suckers!
Debs, we need more detail woman, call yourself a writer. Huh! ;-)
Chopper, LOL! I could "wrap" you up and eat you I could. You so make me laugh :)
Shirley, Oh! Let's try and persuade Lane to do a swop with you. Scabs for fat - fair swop methinks ;-)
I don't know if it's good form to comment twice on a post or not but I just remembered hearing about a woman who sold all her old rubbish to pay for her breast enhancement. I think the process was called 'Tit for Tat!
Some wise guy put a brussels sprout up for sale on ebay just after Christmas! Doubt there were any takers...
Don't go getting rid of your brain Tommo, it's priceless :o) My tat would be everything in the bottom drawer in the kitchen, including a plastic egg poacher and a knitting needle. Don't ask.
Chopper's last comment had me howling with laughter. I could do with a bit of enhancement/uplift myself but, sadly, even I don't have enough tat for that...
Chopper, LOL! Stop It! Although, I quite like the concept kind of UPLIFTING methinks. Pump up the volume :0
Clarkey, A knitting neddle? Maybe it could get together with Tam's chopstick. Stick's away :) Tommox
Shirley, Never mind m'dear someone has to win the BOOBY prize.Please don't feel too deflated :0
TFx
Baggage, lots and lots of it. Guaranteed to send you off on an uncontrollable tangent, a trip, a rampage, or a spin, and ultimately, a voyage of self discovery that will either keep you on that road for a very very long time, or send you packing back home longing for the familiarity of everything you once thought you knew. Free, as is, in a somewhat battered condition, to the first taker.
Oh dear...glad YOU think Chopper is funny...that is my cream he's trying to sell y'ano!
Dar, we'll put it in as a job lot with my bit of tat. 2 for the price of 1. A bargin methinks ;-)
DJ, Shit! sorry :)
TFx
Tat for Tit, surely...
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